3.03.2008

Careful, This One's On a Hair Trigger

Am I the only one who gets all Hulk smash when putting on crib sheets? Is there some trick I'm missing? They don't sell crib mattresses in extra long, right? So WTF is putting sheets on like wrestling a goddamn greased pig, except the grunting's only coming from moi?

8 comments:

Ed said...

You're supposed to change those things? I thought that that was why they invented those rubberized sheets... :) Just kidding of course. When our little bundle of joy was little and bundled and joyful, I was the sheet guy (and, ummm, this continues to this day though the crib has long since gone to the great crib-in-the-sky). My wife doesn't do sheets. Maybe you could convince someone else to change the sheets?

Niebs said...

I just hope you ironed that thing before you put it on the crib.

Sugarmouth O'Riordan said...

Ed--Jody has been banned from any chore or task which requires any sort of finesse. He has a tendency to take "Hulk smash!" from the metaphorical to the literal. The good news is that he is my go-to when brute force is required.

Niebler--Touché. How much time did I have on my hands back then that I was able to indulge my compulsions in such a pointless fashion?

hh said...

you used to iron your sheets???? niebs and i really should have shared a room and warzon with you...

my solution which i stumbled upon accidently - if you stretch out the rubber band enough or rip the sheet a little bit - it's not that bad...

Greased pig said...

I take offense to that comment about wrestling. I seldom grunt when I'm wrestling OS. It's only when she delivers the shocker in an unfair effort to gain the upper hand that I make any noise. I can feel it all the way down to my pig-feet--not pleasant, not pleasant at all.

Vance said...

Hulk no need bedsheets. Only puny humans need bedsheets...

Neutral Milk Hotel

Pat McSheetchanger said...

I always used this method:
1.) Remove mattress from crib
2.) Put sheet over one end of the mattress
3.) Put that end of the mattress on the floor with the mattress vertical and the floor helping hold the sheet in place
4.) Pull the sheet over the other end of the mattress.

I think you get extra leverage or something

Anonymous said...

I feel your pain, have you heard of The Ultimate Crib Sheet? I don't have one myself, but my girlfriends swear by it. Check it out... 4 products in 1 - Quick Change Sheet, Mattress Pad, Super Absorbent Pad, and Waterproof Pad. Elastic straps that snap/unsnap easily without removal of bumper guards or having to completely strip the crib to change the sheet.